Stand-up deity and Master of the Universe God has been criticised by fans for leaving a cloud 20 minutes early following verbal abuse from disgruntled angels during one of his sermons.

God, who assumed he would be preaching to the converted all night and so hadn't bothered coming up with any new material was said to be taken off-guard when a number of angels started shouting abuse and asking for their money back.

The angels say God relied too heavily on passages from an old Bible DVD and had nothing new to say - it seems his Holiness wasn't the only one not smiling when he walked away from the cloud.

There were suggestions from some angels that God had spent too much time with his head in the clouds over LA and needed to take a good, long look at himself ....and then take a good long look at some of the impoverished angels who had scrimped and saved for their special night out...before he starts going all dewy eyed and romancing about his days spent in the Glasgow ship-yards over 40 years ago.

God - who actually thought he was bigger than God - was unavailable for comment.